Alright well since I am in between tests and am sick of studying I’ve decided to post my second blog EVER. Now for those of you who are getting worried thinking that following this blog if I’m posting every day, don’t worry it won’t last forever…just a week or two so please try and stick with me. For today’s blog I have decided to cover a very very personal topic, how I came to know Jesus Christ as my personal Lord and savior. Now before I start you must know a few things from my background…First I have grown up in church and have a strong Christian family that has always backed me 110%. Second, this story like most of my best stories involves basketball because it for 9-10 years of my life was all that I did or wanted to do.
Okay well now that you know these two key things about me I will take you back to where my story begins….cue mystical music and flash back scene ( oh my bad I forget this isn’t a movie). At the age of nine I remember sitting in what we called junior church sometime around Easter listening to our teacher talk about how Jesus died for our sins and things of that nature. After the lesson she asked us to bow our heads and if anyone didn’t know Jesus personally to raise our hands and someone would come get us and show us how we could know him. Well as I’m sure you’re thinking yes I raised my hand. Next thing I know I’m in a little room and the teachers saying things that I’m not sure I understand but I’m nodding anyway. After a while I said a prayer and then she was really happy for me and took me to tell my parents. Yup there’s my story……don’t worry this is just a joke, yes this did happen to me, but before you call and start to witness to me worried that I may not be as saved as I think please read on.
For the next few years I thought I had nailed it down. I was baptized continued going to church, I knew all the right answers during Sunday school and overall I was a good kid so I thought this salvation thing was pretty neat. Suddenly within two years everything changed. The summer of my sixth grade year I was rushed off to a church camp high in the mountains where all you do is freeze and talk to God because there’s really nothing else to do. The entire week at camp I hated it, I knew something was off, but I just figured God was calling me to a mission field and I blew it off. During this week I found out that my youth pastor and very close friend had cancer in his leg that was very far progressed. Needless to say I was devastated. For the first time that I can remember, someone I deeply cared about was hurting and faced with the idea of death at a very young age. Well as if this isn’t bad enough within the same summer, my mother was very sick and was even hospitalized at one point.
I felt like my life had ended. Everything around me was falling apart and I got angry. It got to the point that I knew I probably wasn’t saved, but I didn’t care anymore. God had hurt two important people in my life and it just seemed like there was no hope. Well the summer turned into fall and I did my normal routine of basketball and school, fall turned into spring and it was time to decide what my summer activities would consist of. As I’m sure you can guess church camp was not on my agenda. I went through the motions at church, but you could count me out for spending an entire week talking with someone I had pretty much rejected. Instead I decided to attend the Marsha Sharp basketball camp at Texas Tech because as a seventh grader I could give you every single stat the lady raiders had. Whether it was height, shooting percentages, hometowns, I knew it all….and some of them I still remember to this day! I was super excited to in my mind forget about church and everything else for the week and just play basketball.
Well my plan seemed to be working until the day before we had to pack up and go back home. Each day after lunch we had a “Let’s talk basketball” session where different coaches and players would pick a topic of their choice and talk about it to all of the campers. On this particular day, my favorite basketball player in like the entire world was speaking, Alesha Robertson. Now for any of you who don’t know who she is she was #55 for Texas Tech and was an awesome 3 point shooter. Her topic of choice was goals, seems harmless enough right? Well wrong, the goal that she had set for herself and decided to discuss with all of us was to be the best example for Christ she could be whether that was through playing basketball or whatever else she chose to do in life. This speech hit me like a ton of bricks. She used Colossians 3:23 as her verse and discussed how if we didn’t have a purpose in life such as Christ then we were living for nothing. Well haha yup fear and many other emotions set in. I knew from the time she finished her speech that I didn’t have a purpose. I had nothing that I was living for. In my mind I had said a prayer and I was done.
Despite realizing it this early into the summer which was June, I put it off. For reasons I’m still not sure I can explain I did nothing. I guess to some extent I was embarrassed. By admitting I didn’t know Christ I had to in my mind look like a fake and a failure to all of my friends and family, and I had entirely too much pride and just couldn’t do it. It was a horrible feeling. It got to the point that I was lying awake at night certain God would come back and my entire family would be gone leaving me in the house alone. It was SO bad that I would get up every two hours go downstairs make sure each of my family members was safe and sound in their beds and then I would go back to sleep. Now before I go any further I want to say that if any of you out there are doing this STOP now!!! It’s not worth it!! No one’s going to think any less of you, and even if they do who cares! You can get your eternal life nailed down and stop playing dominos!!! You never know when you last breath will be taken so fix this now!!
Finally July 11 which was roughly a month later I decided to do something or at least try to do something about it. My dad was out of town so I knew that I could confront my mom alone. I tried all day, but never found the courage to say anything. That night I pretended to go to be, but then got back up around 11 and went to my mom’s room to casually watch TV. I sat there with her in silence until at least 1 a ‘clock in the morning unable to move or speak I was so nervous and scared. Finally she said she was going to bed and kind of expected me to leave or say something, but I couldn’t I just sat there dumbfounded shaking beyond belief. Finally, I broke down and just started to cry. I can only imagine what was running through my mom’s head as she sat there and tried to comfort me and understand what was wrong. Finally after months of struggling I managed to get out the words “I’m lost.” I had finally reached the first step, realization that I was a sinner on my way to hell. Next my mom told me that I knew what I needed to do, and she held my hand as I prayed. This is where the next few steps came in…I prayed and repented of my sin. I realized that on my own there was nothing that I or anyone else on earth could do to save me from hell; I had to ask Jesus to save me because He is the only way. This was the third step, after realizing and repenting, I received the Lord Jesus Christ into my heart where He still is to this very day!!! That’s the best part about salvation! Once Christ lives in you He never leaves no matter what you do!!
I guess all that’s left to do now is the follow up story. Six years later, I am still in church and do not regret my decision to trust in Jesus Christ one tiny little smidgen. It was and is and always will be the greatest most important decision in my entire life! Now don’t get me wrong, there are times when walking with the Lord isn’t easy and it’s at times a struggle, but I promise once you trust in Jesus you don’t ever want to go back!!!! Well 45 minutes later I guess I better get back to study for my history exam! I hope that you all have wonderful days, and if I don’t have some type of contact with you before I also wish you all a very merry Christmas!!!!!
I know my purpose what’s yours?
Lexie
